What Engineers Say

& What it Really Means


Engineer to English Dictionary
By: The Working Man

* The Engineer Says: We are approaching the problem from many
different angles.

English Translation: We have no idea what's wrong.

* The Engineer Says: We have some of our best men on it.

English Translation: We have three new employees, who have
no idea which end of the screwdriver to hold, working on
your car or project.

* The Engineer Says: We are closely supervising the repairs.

English Translation: We are watching wrestling in the office
and eating donuts while your car or project sits in the
garage or workshop.

* The Engineer Says: We just had a major technical

English Translation: It Works! Hopefully, it stays that way.

* The Engineer Says: Customer satisfaction is guaranteed upon

English Translation: If you ever see your car or
project again you will be so happy that you won't mind that
it isn't working exactly right.

* The Engineer Says: The preliminary tests we ran on it were

English Translation: Well, the thing blew up
when we turned it on and now we are trying to figure out how
to put it back together.

The Engineer Says: The test results came out extremely good.

English Translation: It Works! It works! We don't know how
but it works!

* The Engineer Says: I'm sorry but it just won't work.

English Translation: The only person who knew what to do
and how to fix it quit.

* The Engineer Says: It's in the works.

English Translation: If you ever see this again you are lucky.

* The Engineer Says: We will look into it.

English Translation: Oops, forgot.

* The Engineer Says: Please sign and date.

English Translation: We don't want you to sue us.

* The Engineer Says: What do you think?

English Translation: We will humor you because you are
the client but we really don't care what is coming
out of your mouth.

* The Engineer Says: How would you interpret this?

English Translation: Ha, Ha, ha, ha.

* The Engineer Says: Let's talk.

English Translation: I'm bored and lonely and you are
good looking (if female). Or, I'm just bored and lonely.

* The Engineer Says: As good as new!

English Translation: We just Mickey Moused it together
and it works, for now.

* The Engineer Says: Rugged.

English Translation: This is too darn heavy to lift.

* The Engineer Says: Lightweight.

English Translation: Not as heavy as rugged but still
too heavy to lift.

* The Engineer Says: After years of development.

English Translation: One of them finally worked.

* The Engineer Says: Energy saver.

English Translation: Saves energy when it is turned off.

* The Engineer Says: Easy to maintain.

English Translation: You can't fix it if it breaks.

* The Engineer Says: We adjusted it while testing.

English Translation: We smacked it with a hammer.

* The Engineer Says: It took some persuasion.

English Translation: We hit it with a hammer several times till it worked.

* The Engineer Says: It must be the _______ again. (insert part)

English Translation: I have no idea why it isn't working
or started working or is working again but I'm
going to take the credit.

Find more Cool Stuff to make You Laugh

Web      Search This Site

Home Page
Map of our Site

Choose To Prosper